Naughty, Kinky Thoughts Flowing Like a River

If you’ve been following along, you know I’ve had some Dommy confidence issues. I’ve been trying to get myself back into the organized, always have a plan, Domme that I am. After taking almost two weeks off to enjoy some beautiful Caribbean weather, it has been quite the task getting back organized.

Thanks to locking hubby up, talking about an intense D/s session with him, chatting all sexy with friends in email, text and Twitter and getting back to reading sexy blogs, I’m feeling much better about my kinky state. I will admit I was a bit worried that I lost my kinky but I think it just came down to not being in a kinky environment. I’m definitely a chameleon and have always been when it comes to social situations. I can fit in anywhere and be what I need to be to fit in – always continuing to be myself in the process but censoring what needs to be censored out of respect for the rest of the world. So I feel like spending 2 weeks in the “vanilla” world and not thinking or really even talking kinky set me back. It’s coming back all kinds of lovely now. ๐Ÿ™‚

The past few days, as I’ve said, I’ve had some chats with people and read some stuff that has gotten my creative fantasy juices flowing, not to mention other juices. I thought I’d come here and write them down. This way you all get to enjoy my kinky fantasy thoughts and I get to get all turned on thinking about you enjoying them. And what you might be doing with yourself while enjoying them – if you are lucky enough not to be locked in a cage that is. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve had some amazing thoughts going on, from spanking to sensory deprivation, from simple bondage to full on Doggystyle Stockade with an attached fucking machine.

I was looking through pics on my phone and found one of cagedmonkey’s gorgeous ass, nice and red after I spanked him over my knee bare handed. Good God is it a beautiful thing to look at and remember how it feels to spank him as he squirms and whimpers in my lap. I started to think about how much enjoyment I get when using my paddle too. When I have him bound spread eagle, face down on the bed spanking his ass, thighs and even spreading those cheeks and giving his tight little asshole a swat.
I also recently read, over at Chastity Forums I think, about a guy who’s wife made him wear rubber gloves as a way to diminish his sensation when touching her, or something like that… so that got me thinking a lot about sensory deprivation. I’ve often tried to think of a way that I could deprive cagedmonkey of some of his senses, including touch, but still get what I need from him – like his touch! So this whole rubber glove thing got me going. If I’ve got cagedmonkey restrained, in the hood, ear buds in with something playing on his S5 or iPod, caged but having the RodeoH and my favorite dildo attached and rubber gloves on him there is quite a bit of possibility there. I just think there is an awful lot of frustration to be had while I’m able to please myself and he can feel absolutely nothing.

My thoughts have also gone deeper, rather quickly, as my need to dominate my husband sexually has increased. I’ve started thinking a lot about the Doggystle stockade we’ve mentioned in the past wanting to get. We’ve had all kinds of mindfuck sessions thinking about the things we could do with a piece of furniture like this. Even more recently we’ve gotten even more intense with our fantasies and added in thoughts of the attached fucking machine (which led us to the site linked above).

So many fantastic, naughty things could happen with this set up. Not only could we do some of the things mentioned in previous posts, while hubby is being excruciatingly slowly violated by the fucking machine but we could also use it as a torture device. The site we’ve been looking at also has Fleshlight attachments for the fucking machine which could be used to force fuck cagedmonkey for, potentially, hours at whatever pace a please. Perhaps juuuuuuuuust slow enough that he can’t cum but not too slow that he could lose his erection. Or, perhaps, it could be used to continue stroking him post orgasm for some torture. So many ideas ranging from forced anal violation to forced orgasms but isn’t that why I’m in control? I get to decide when and what sexual pleasure or torture he will have to endure and for how long.

The other thing I’ve been fantasizing about with having this machine, since we aren’t into the actual physical side of cuckolding, is the potential to kind of cuckold cagedmonkey. I could fuck myself with the machine in every way I like over and over, having him tied in the stackade portion, forced to watch me cum. Forced to see the pleasure I get while he is locked there wishing he was the one pleasing me. Watching as a machine takes his place and fucks his wife inches from his face where he can smell my sex and is aching and dripping, wanting to taste me… feel me… touch me.

As you can see my naughty, kinky thoughts are coming back just fine. I am loving being back home because I’m getting that, ever so intense, growly, hungry, animalistic, horny growing inside me and I need to take it out on cagedmonkey.

Going Deeper and Getting Darker

It’s creeping up on a month since my last orgasm now, and I can definitely feel my horniness taking on a whole new intensity. I don’t know if it’s because ML has been teasing me out of the cage more, or if it’s the use of the super-confining Revenge, or it could just be the fact that I’m a male with an incredibly high sex drive who has gone cum-less for so long…. but I can feel the need growing. I’d never use my safeword with ML just because I wanted to cum, but this weekend for the first time I considered thinking about possibly maybe using it. It’s that bad.

And I have how much longer to go?

Actually, the answer to that question is not 100% clear. It has been somewhat assumed that my next Maybe Day is our anniversary, seeing as we go on our Carribean cruise the week following. Assumed, but not decided on. And, as always, it is ML’s choice to make whether or not I actually get to cum on any Maybe Day. I feel somewhat safe about this time around; after this, I honestly have no clue.

I can feel my sexual need starting to take over me. Any time I am close to ML, any time I look at her I get turned on. I’ve had to battle with incredibly strong morning wood just about all week, my cock filling the cage and nearly bursting through the bars of the Jailbird. And my fantasies have beginning to get veryย intense.

Oddly enough, this is very exciting to me. I was secretly worried that maybe I was starting to veer off of the “kink” path in some ways, but these urges show me otherwise. I’ll explain. For the past few weeks, ML has been using my face to get her horny pussy off. I am enjoying it to no end. There have been moments, however, where she gets a little overeager and covers my face with her gooey wetness enough where I am unable to breathe.ย  We’ve explored this beforeย and enjoyed it very much, but recently I’ve been trying to avoid it. I don’t know why, exactly… I just wasn’t into it. But now that my uncontrollable horniness has taken over, I’m very aggreeable to whatever ML wants to do with me – whether it be smother me with her huge titties, force me to lick her pussy until my jaw aches, or queening me until I pass out tongue fucking her ass.

Even our most recent discussions about the pseudo-cuckolding fantasies are getting darker and more intense… do I really want to be locked into the steel bars and be forced to watch another man jerk off and cum all over my wife’s tits? Do I want to be teased mercilessly, edged over and over, and have to beg this man to either let me have an orgasm or allow the torment to stop?

I guess the real question is… do I want to have a choice in the matter?

I’m pretty sure I know the answer to that question.

I Think I Need a Girlfriend :)

Lately I’ve been having some fantastic fantasies about this friend of mine. Cagedmonkey and I share pics with another very sexy married couple. I would consider them a vanilla couple and sending us naughty pics of their intimate time together is about as far this side of kinky as they get. That’s ok though, I enjoy them just how they are.

Anyway, as I said, I’ve been having these fantasies about this friend. She has big beautiful breasts, the kind a girl just wants to squeeze and fondle. She’s a gorgeous girl too so… I mean, yum! Btw, I’m not bisexual but I sure can appreciate another woman, especially when she deserves to be appreciated! ๐Ÿ™‚ As I said, I’ve been having fantasies but not the kind you’re probably thinking. I’m not thinking of her fully for my pleasure haha these thoughts are of doing things with her to tease hubby.

It sure helps that I can tease him with these thoughts too… and he’s seen the pictures and can totally envision all of the hot ass sexy things I’m describing.

One day I hope to meet my girlfriend in real life and maybe one day she and I can tease our husbands while we get some playtime in with each other! ๐Ÿ™‚ mmmmm fantasies!

The Conflicting Feelings of a Chaste Hubby

My Lady and I were texting each other last night while I was at work, and the conversation wandered to the topic of sensory deprivation. You see, ML has been doing some research in that area, specifically sensory deprivation hoods. And when ML starts doing research, you know that she’s getting serious about it.

She began to text me some of the ideas that have been popping up in her head, and I couldn’t help but get turned on (which made my cock strain against the cage rather strongly). Here are just a few examples of the texts she sent me:

  • “like putting your hands in mittens behind your back, making you kneel on the floor hooded”
  • “I could open only the gag and make you choke on my dildo”
  • “I could take off the blindfold with my pussy right in your face while I cum”
  • “Put a dildo in your ass and make you sit on it while I fuck your mouth with mine”
  • “So if I told you I could put the hood on and use the face dildo as the gag piece instead and fuck your sensory deprived face, how would that make you feel?”

How would it make me feel?

Those sound like horrible, terrible things to have to endure. I don’t know if I could take it.

How would it make me feel?

I need to experience this.

That’s how it makes me feel. I can imagine myself in the moment, wanting it to end so badly, wondering why and how I got myself into this, suffering in pain and frustration. Yet it’s undeniable – I want it to happen. When I read those texts – and even now as I retype them – I get a tightness in my chest that says to me, “Oh. My. God. I NEED THIS.”

It’s scary and confusing to have these types of feelings – to want something you don’t want to happen happen, so badly. But honestly, that’s pretty much what chastity is. I’m sitting here with my cock locked in a steel cage with no way to get out on my own, and I desperately want to cum. But I want to be like this – desperate for release, yet powerless to facilitate that release, completely dependent on My Lady for any and all sources of sexual pleasure. I trust My Lady with my life; I know she will protect me and keep me safe, even when she is putting me through hell just because she can and she wants to. It speaks to my devotion to her how badly I want this to happen, even though I don’t want this to happen.

Now I’m left wondering just when she plans on putting these things in motion…

Bad to the Boner

My Lady recently postedย on a common dilema that keyholders face: do they want their sub to be so desperate that he will disobey his domme? It’s a very interesting take, and I completely understand where she is coming from.ย  Speaking for myself, I’m not the type to go against my keyholder. I absolutely LOVE being subjected to her desires, servicing her needs, and partaking in her pleasure. Nothing turns me on more than pleasing My Lady. I would probably need some sort of signal from her to indicate her mood, otherwise I would most likely obey her to the ends of the earth. After all, isn’t that what I got into this for?

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I never really understood the purpose of an “anti-pullout” feature on a chastity device. I get the idea of increased security leading to a more complete chastity experience, but an anti-pullout device really shouldn’t be necessary. First of all, if you need to be prevented from pulling out that badly, you’re going to find another way to get out of your cage. Even the best designed anti-pullout can be defeated with a little determination… and a fair bit of pain, I would assume! Second of all, if you need to be prevented from pulling out that badly, it probably means that you aren’t ready for the realities of giving over complete control in a chastity situation. Nobody out there has “accidentally” slipped out of their cage; it’s a deliberate action to disobey your keyholder.

Why would a man in chastity want to purposefully disobey his keyholder? In my opinion, these are guys who are still trying to cling to some sense of control over their situation – “topping from the bottom,” as it were. These are the guys who tell their keyholder what they want to have done to them, and throw a tantrum when they don’t get it. These are the guys who lock themselves in a device without the request of their keyholder.ย  They aren’t ready to hand over full and complete control to their keyholder.

And you know what? It’s okay! It’s okay if you are one of those guys. Nobody should enter a full, indefinite chastity lifestyle (like the one My Lady and I live) without considering their true feelings about being powerless. Communication between the sub and keyholder about these feelings is important so both can find common ground to start on. If you don’t start off on the same page, resentment can build in the relationship. And resentment is a total turnoff.