He Said, She Said: Losing Control in Chastity (w/Guest Blogger Tom Allen)

[The following is a He Said, She Said featuring, one of my favorite bloggers, Tom Allen. Please take time (after you read my blog! Haha) to visit Tom’s blog. He’s a very experienced man with plenty to say on sexual intimacy and relationships, as well as some of the kinky stuff. Thanks Tom for taking time to write with me! ]

Lady M: Every so often, on my favorite Male Chastity forums, a specific subject comes up. Those guys that are relatively new to chastity and have managed to get their gf, wife or partner into it, run into a road block. It goes a little something like this: A guy wants his woman to take control, he finally gets his otherwise vanilla girl to agree to chastity & gives her the key. He then starts to freak out because he can’t get a hold of his cock for 3 days and asks for the key back. When his girl refuses, because she’s supposed to be in control he gets whiny, nasty, sullen, or even belligerent. She gives in, unlocks him and probably even let’s him cum. Then she feels bad, he feels bad, he apologizes, and the cycle may even start all over again with another attempt at lock up.

Surprisingly enough this is a pretty common issue that comes up early on. A lot of times
on the forums the response is “you asked for this” or “you’re locked up now, you have to deal with it and do what she says.” While ultimately that is the goal, chastity has a learning curve and not all guys are perfectly submissive and not all women are Dominant to the bone.

Tom Allen: Orgasm control/denial is a really odd kink. For most guys, the kink is really about the control, rather than the orgasm itself. Sexual pleasure is a very powerful force, and most OD kinksters have the fantasy of having the control of that pleasure taken out of their hands, so to speak.

When men are aroused, their judgment is sometimes clouded by the sexy-horny-aroused feelings that are churning away, and they will paradoxically masturbate furiously to the fantasy of a stern mistress who will not allow them to have an orgasm. In real life, however, most men are married or partnered with regular women who don’t understand their desire to be controlled. A chastity device should make this easier, right? Just lock it up and go about your business.

Ironically, though, the device actually makes it more difficult for most guys. Men wearing a device, especially if they are new at it, have a constant reminder that they are not allowed to touch themselves, not allowed to wank, and not allowed an orgasm. The device needs constant adjustment, and even a brief tumescence results in what often feels like the firm grip of a loving hand, sending more signals of arousal into their primitive brains.

The problems come when they begin to overload on the arousal. In the way that a cup of coffee is a nice start to the day, but five cups leave you jittery and snappish, a few days of arousal gives you a nice glow, but by the end of the week, you’re irritable from not being able to calm down. This is where the fantasy of a strict Domme runs smack into the wall of a real life relationship: In the fantasy, you’re always feeling submissive, or if you’re not, then your Domme just gives you a few smacks on your ass with the riding crop to change your attitude. In real life, your partner is pretty tired of your whining, complaining, pouting, or bitching, and is ready to give you back the key for good.

Lady M: I hear all too often, how other Keyholders are angry or upset or need advice on how to handle their guys when they get like this. They feel confused because these guys just asked them to take control of their dick and now they are being whiny, crabby and sometimes flat out mean. It can be very stressful on a woman to be a Keyholder, especially when she isn’t particularly dominant. When their guys get like that most feel like, “what the hell am I doing this for, this isn’t worth it” or “why am I putting up with this, this isn’t fun or a turn on.” I’m assuming there are plenty of emotions running through a guys head too, but I’m sure you can speak to that better than I can, Tom. After all you have the locked up cock, not me. 🙂

Tom Allen: Most guys simply are not prepared for the roller-coaster of arousal and frustration that they experience when they are first denied, and some do not handle it well at all. Instead of being submissive or appreciative, they become irritated and clingy, and develop a need for constant attention.

To be fair, though, many chastity newbs have rarely or never, gone for more than a couple of days without an orgasm, and are completely at a loss as to how to handle the constant arousal. In addition, the arousal triggers hormones, which in turn affect their emotions. While it’s a sweeping generalization to say that men don’t handle their feelings well, it may be correct to say that they don’t know how to handle the constantly changing emotions that have suddenly been dumped into their bodies.

Some guys learn to deal with it. Unfortunately, some don’t, and they unintentionally lash out at their partner for doing exactly what they were asked to do in the first place.

Lady M: There are a few ways a more vanilla woman can handle the situation. Sometimes it is as simple as telling them to suck it up… if the Keyholder is strong enough to deal with the whiny behavior. Perhaps she wants to punish him for that behavior and spank him etc. Honestly, though, not all women are overly dominant and aren’t into correcting behavior like that. Most women are dealing with the everyday, cleaning the house, working, taking care of kids and already dealing with their kids behavior and correcting them. At least I know I am being a stay at home mom! It’s not easy adding to that but in the end we do benefit once it falls into place.

Tom Allen: The trope in the chastity world is that once the guy is locked up, he immediately “has to do whatever she says” if he is going to get any kind of relief or release. In reality, most of us are living normal lives, working, mowing the lawn, going to school plays, cleaning the gutters, paying bills, and doing all of that within the context of a relationship. If your partner doesn’t normally “correct” your attitude or behavior with a spanking (or whatever), then even if she suddenly switched from June Cleaver to Mistress Cruella, chances are that you’re still not going to suddenly switch off your crankiness.

And let me take a moment to mention that the Mistress Cruella trope is a typically male-driven fantasy, anyhow. Most women when they take a dominant role that’s of their own choosing (as opposed to play-acting for a partner) tend to demand attention and obedience from a loving and respectful servant; they do not typically think in terms of harsh treatment and punishment. The men who are imagining their partners in such a role are already setting themselves up for disappointment.

Lady M: Leaving the keys out of it is one way. You can do this by giving them to a friend, a fellow Keyholder or store it in another location, etc. There are also a number of dice games, card games and other games that decide the length of lock up… though doing something like that ultimately removes some control that a Keyholder is supposed to have. Most guys want their woman to control when, where and for how long he has his cock locked up in a cage as well as when and how he will orgasm. This definitely isn’t the way I handle things because I need to be in complete control. I guess that makes me a control freak hehe. I will say we did try to go by the “set date” thing and I just felt bad when I would unlock early because I wanted to… that’s when I realized I AM in control and I can change the rules anytime I want.

Tom Allen: I have mixed feelings on this. Mrs. Edge and I have always agreed that she should have 100% control, so we never had a point system, dice games, XX number of days, etc., because all of those things removed or mitigated her control. That said, Mrs. Edge, herself, discovered that she liked having 100% of the control, so what we did worked for us.

I do understand that some women don’t care about the control, or would prefer not to have to deal with a partner that is whining or complaining. Using a random number, like a dart toss or a dice roll removes some of the responsibility, so she can tell her partner “Hey, don’t be mad at me, you rolled a double 6, remember?”

An aside: Mrs. Edge often left her key at work, but that was so she, herself, wouldn’t be tempted to use it. Sometimes she set a time period in her own mind (I was never told how long it would be), and she found it easier to leave her key inaccessible so she wouldn’t have to break her own promise to herself. Women are weird.

Lady M: A woman can also handle it in another way that isn’t usually brought up because it seems to be a more vanilla, not so dominant way of doing things.  Sometimes, giving a chaste guy more attention (especially in the beginning) helps, even praising while teasing. Saying things like “You’re doing so good handling my teasing” or “Only  a few more days to go, I’m really proud of you.”

Tom Allen: I don’t think that this is just a vanilla approach. In fact, since I never knew how long she expected me to hold out for, I found it helpful for her to suggest things like “You’re doing really well, you can hold out another week for me, can’t you? Come on, just one more week?” With that approach, she used to keep me going for months at a time.

Lady M: Although I am super lucky that I don’t have to deal with these situations too often, as I have a pretty obedient subby hubby. He understands he’s given up control… but nothing’s perfect and it does happen in even the best situations. I tend to deal with the crabbies in a mix of these ways and can do the hardass “too bad, deal with it” thing as well as the “awww poor baby” thing and it seems to get us through well enough. I like to think I’m pretty strong and stubborn and my dominance is built in deep.

Tom Allen: People, and their relationships, are so variable that there probably isn’t one thing that will work better, or even consistently. I’ve always cautioned men who are new to chastity devices to approach things slowly, and to give themselves time to adjust to wearing a device; it can often take weeks before your body adapts to 24/7 wear. I guess that I should also caution them that it may take quite some time to adapt to the emotional fluctuations that they will likely experience.

My suggestion to women who find themselves in this situation is to not believe your partner if he asks for a lengthy period of lock up, unless he has been working himself up to it for weeks or months. And if you already are holding your partner’s key, and he reacts negatively, try not to react out of anger. Instead, try to understand that he has not developed the coping skills to handle long periods of denial, and that he will need your help in learning to see the changes he’s going through. Ask him if he’s sure that he wants the key back, or if he can wait one more day. Just a day, and then you’ll check in with him again. Some men will take the key, and then feel embarrassed later at their lack of resolve. Others will probably take the key once, and then the next time remember how they felt, and try to hold off for a little longer. And some will manage to calm themselves down once they realize that they can, if they needed, have you remove the device.

I know that this sounds like a lot of work on the part of the (probably reluctant) keyholder. It probably will be, at first, but the payoff is that once your partner realizes just how much work you were willing to do in order to make him happy, he will be willing to return the effort to show his appreciation. Once he learns how to cope, that is

In For The Long Haul (or How a Forced Ruined Orgasm Got Me Locked Up 24/7 For Over a Month)

My Lady has been thoroughly enjoying teasing my cock over the past few days, knowing full well that my next orgasm will be many months from now. Today, she decided to continue her growing dominance over me by forcing my body to do her bidding.

I went upstairs to take a nap late in the morning to adjust my sleep schedule after the weekend, and ML followed me upstairs to tuck me in. Still looking to satisfy her bondage craving, she cuffed me to the bed and began stroking my cock as she kissed me; I was hard for her within a few seconds. ML then went and grabbed the wand vibrator from the side of the bed. She used an extra set of velco cuffs to secure the wand to the shaft of my cock. Then she hit the switch, sending powerful vibrations all over and through my cock. I moaned loudly and pushed my hips up into the air. It felt soooooo good.

ML petted my cock, her fingers feeling just as good, if not better than the vibrations from the wand. She leaned in close to me, and looked right into my eyes.

“I’m going downstairs. You better be a good boy and not spill your cum, otherwise I’m going to lock you up for a month and a half with absolutely NO time out.” Then she stood up and left the room. “See you in a while,” she said as she shut the door.

I knew right away that I was in trouble.

For starters, I already knew it was possible for the wand to force me into a ruined orgasm in this type of situation; it had happened before. It was only a matter of time before my body gave in to the incessant vibrations. I also knew by the look in ML’s eyes that she was dead serious; if I had an orgasm, I’d be in the cage until August most likely. Part of me wondered if ML set me up to fail, that she was using this as the opening to an extended 24/7 lockup we had discussed in the past. But, as always, I want to be a good boy for My Lady. So I tried to hold off. I took deep breaths, I let my mind wander to a number of different non-sexy subjects. And, miraculously, it seemed as though I was getting a handle on it. My cock was softening. I was going to make it!

Then, as my cock started to soften, the wand must have slipped just the tiniest fraction of an inch, sending sensations to a different area of my shaft… a much more sensitive area.

My cock was once again stiff in an instant. I could feel the vibrations flowing through my cock in waves. I tried as hard as I could to hold off, but I could feel the orgasm creeping up on me. Slowly, torturously it came nearer. I gave it one last effort, holding it back with all of my body. But it was no use.

I moaned loudly as my body gave in, my cock pouring cum out onto the bed sheets as it twitched against the wand. Much like the last time, the orgasm was by no means satisfying; I needed stroking on my shaft to give me a full orgasm. Instead, my cum-covered cock twitched helplessly against the wand, begging for more stimulation but receiving none. I moaned in frustration, knowing that not only would the ruined orgasm make my need to cum even worse, but that I also doomed myself to a month-plus of having no erections whatsoever.

My Lady came upstairs shortly after (she must have heard my moans). She acted as if she was disappointed in me – calling me a bad boy, disobeying his lady, getting messy when I shouldn’t.* Then she explained that she would uncuff me and I would immediately head downstairs, and put the cage on as I was taking a shower. “Make sure it’s comfortable,” she said, “because it’s not coming off for a LONG time!” I did as ordered, locking the Jailbird on my cock, wondering what it will feel like after a month and a half of not seeing or feeling my cock get fully hard. How frustrated will I be? How relieved will I be to get the cage off? Will I even survive it to find out the answers to these questions? I guess there’s nothing I can do but let time pass now.

*Note: My Lady did mention to me out-of-role later in the day that she meant for this to happen all along. She was most likely going to leave me up there until the wand ruined my orgasm no matter what. If I managed to hold off, thent he struggling I’d go through would be enough torture, but she REALLY wanted to lock me up 24/7 until our next vacation in August. I was very thankful she told me this. After all, I pride myself on being a good boy; knowing I was doomed from the start was somewhat comforting.  🙂

Moment Savored

Today I had my last orgasm of 2014.

Well, actually, I had three of them, but that’s beside the point. The point is that I won’t have another one for the rest of the year.

Thankfully, I knew this going in, so I was able to get really nice mental pictures of all of them. My first cum of the day was in the morning – before I went to sleep, My Lady came upstairs to “tuck me in.” She cuffed my hands to the bed, climbed on top of me and rode my cock until I was just about ready to explode. Then the stroked me the rest of the way while sliding a finger in and out of my asshole.  It sure helped me get to sleep, I can tell you that!

My second and third orgasms were pretty much back to back. ML once again gave me some anal stimulation during my orgasm, only this time it was a little bit more than her finger; she used Pearl on me and she allowed me to stroke myself to orgasm. That was a REALLY nice one! It has been a while since I stroked my own cock to orgasm, so I don’t know if that made it so great, or if it was Pearl giving me a little extra sumthin’ sumthin’, but it was a really good cum. The third was right afterwards – ML continued to stroke me right after my orgasm, giving me a little bit of POT for good measure. She got me close and then allowed me to jerk myself off again… it was my birthday, after all, and is there a better present than allowing your chaste male to masturbate? I didn’t think so! I made myself cum a third time, and I was nearly drained by the end of it. I think this was ML’s goal, because she promptly had me lock up in the Jailbird before I headed to work.

And so begins my 6-month-plus period of orgasm denial (ML has said that I might get an orgasm for Christmas, or perhaps I’ll have to wait until 2015, she isn’t sure). This is going to be a difficult test for me. Not only will my denial be the longest I’ve ever gone through (by far!), My Lady and I have discussed trying some things during this chastity period that will also set new benchmarks. She wants to keep me in the Revenge  for longer than I’ve been before, locking my cock away where I can’t even see it let alone touch it. She is also interested in attempting a longer period of denying my any erections at all, locking me in the Jailbird 24/7 for a full month. With the discovery of ML’s new favorite toy, going that long will be easier than it has been in the past.

Well, easier on her at least. It doesn’t get any easier for me no matter what happens. And I know that ML will be taking every opportunity to make things even more difficult for me, teasing me whenever possible. I can already see the excitement in her eyes, and we’ve barely just begun. But I have to admit… I’m excited about this, too. I’m exicted to see just how far I can push myself, and how much farther ML can push me after I break down.  🙂

He Said, She Said: The Breaking Point (Part 1)

cagedmonkey: You hear stories here and there about guys who are locked in chastity long term, how they get so frustrated that they break down in tears. Yeah, right, I thought. I might get a little desperate, but it’s not going to be so bad to make me start crying. Well, I must admit that I was wayyyyyyy wrong.

ML called an audible today and deviated from her “progression plan” and instead left me unlocked for a good portion of the day. No rest for the weary, however; she stopped me multiple times during the day and told me to go somewhere private and stroke myself for the four minutes that her plan called for, obviously no cumming but also no stopping during those four minutes. Sometimes she would come and watch me if the kids were occupied, otherwise I was on the honor system. I somehow managed to keep my honor intact throughout all of this, but it really frustrated me deeply.

My body just did not want to accept that, even though I was going through all of the familiar motions of masturbation that had been so habitual in the past, I would not be experiencing the slowly-becoming-unfamiliar climax. It was difficult to refrain from cheating. SERIOUSLY. I wanted to cum. I needed to cum. And I was doing the one thing that my body was so used to doing in order to cum. But I wasn’t going to cum.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If this happened once, it would have been bad enough. This happened at least six times during the day. I was a puddle of frustrated goo when ML instructed me to put the Jailbird back on. Once my cage was back on, she straddled me and began to rub her wet pussy against the imprisoned cock. She began to moan louder and louder, and I knew she was about to cum.

Then I completely lost it.

I began squirming and whimpering; it felt like she was taking my orgasm away from me (which was incorrect… she always owned it from the beginning). She leaned in close and asked me what was wrong. I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t cum. I did the only thing I could do. I started to cry. ML looked down and saw me sobbing, and something must have flipped a switch inside her because she immediately stood up and SHOVED her soaked pussy into my face. She covered my whole face with her pussy lips. I continued to whimper and cry, only this time right into her pussy. Amazingly, this triggered a HUGE orgasm for ML; she humped against me even harder, looking into my troubled eyes and taking every ounce of pleasure I could hope for and used it for herself. I could feel myself breaking, and she was playing with the pieces and having the time of her life.

As she came down, she could see that I was really in trouble. She looked at me with love and tenderness, and she asked me the perfect question for the situation: she asked if I needed to use my safeword. She did care, she was concerned that I was okay. And I was SOOOOO tempted to use it. I even asked her to promise that if I said it that I could cum, and she agreed. But I didn’t use it – I wasn’t in danger, I wasn’t in unbearable pain, I wasn’t scared or any of the other reasons I told myself I would only use my safeword for. My torment was not to end tonight.

My Lady was wonderful. She held me tight for some sweet aftercare. Then, I suddenly got this urge, this unyielding urge to service her. I gently pushed her back and began to lick her pussy like a madman, rubbing my tongue and chin all over her dripping pussy. She moaned and writhed on the couch as she came hard, but I wasn’t done and neither was she. She took my hand and guided it to her pussy, and I slid two fingers deep inside her. She gasped as a wave of pleasure hit her. I used my fingers on her firmly, but not roughly, and extremely deep. After just a few seconds, she thrusted her hips as high as she could off the couch and let out a powerful grunt. She was cumming harder than I had ever seen her cum before, and it wasn’t stopping. Her hips met the couch again, but her body continues to shake as the massive orgasm plowed through her body. Her attempts to keep quiet began to fail as her moans grew louder and louder until they blended together into a high pitched squeal. My God, I was in heaven. If I couldn’t cum, at least I could experience taking a part of giving My Lady an orgasm that was more than big enough for the both of us.

When she finally collapsed into the couch, she was exhausted. We looked at each other with amazement. What the fuck??? Did ML just have the best orgasm of her life because she made me break down and cry in frustration? It was undeniable – she got off on my suffering.

It was an incredible night, like nothing I had ever experienced before. Maybe Day cannot get here fast enough. I am still in dire need of an orgasm. My suffering gets worse every day as My Lady enjoys the control she wields over it. This is what I asked for. This is what the fantasy of enforced chastity is all about. And I wouldn’t change a damn thing. Because I know when I finally am allowed to have an orgasm, it will not be a decision that My Lady will take lightly. I will be truly deserving of such a gift.

Read Part 2 of He Said, She Said: The Breaking Point to experience it from ML’s point of view!

He Said, She Said: The Breaking Point (Part 2)

Lady M: I’m sure you’ve already read Cagedmonkey’s take on last night in the Part 1 post. Wow! Last night was something else! Cagedmonkey and I got the kids to bed and relaxed a little watching some How I Met Your Mother on Netflix. I just loved cuddling on the couch with his arm across my chest. It makes me feel so safe, so comfortable and so loved. ❤

I'm not going to repeat everything he wrote so I'll jump to the part where I was straddling him on the couch. After teasing him so much all day long he was already gasping as I lifted a leg to sit on him. I started to circle my hips, rubbing my pussy over his caged cock and he was moaning and started those super hot whimpering sounds. It was absolutely driving me mad in the pit of my stomach and I could feel my pussy juices gushing out between my freshly shaved lips. I was feeling it so deep that I couldn't help myself and I stood up on the couch and started fucking his face right into the back of the couch. I pushed my hips forward hard over and over smashing his nose into my clit forcing my juices into his mouth as I came so fucking hard. Hearing him moan, whimper and even sobbing with his face buried in my pussy was overwhelmingly arousing. I completely loved feeling and hearing him get to his breaking point. Knowing he was there only fueled my desire to fuck his face more and I kept going, kept pushing him past his breaking point.

What an incredible feeling! Though even with my euphoric feelings I could see that my poor cagedmonkey was really in distress. I had to do the right thing. I had to ask if he needed his safeword. I assured him I would not be disappointed if he used it. I assured him that I would respect his decision, he needs to feel safe and know he can trust me. The guy has not only been denied orgasm for almost 3 months but daily he has had to deal with my relentless teasing and sometimes very very very intense teasing. I've discovered recently that I am a very intense person to handle, I'm aggressive and I do not have a "light" version when it comes to cagedmonkey. I'm lucky to have a man who is able to handle such an aggressive cock tease. He did choose not to use his safeword and I did have a feeling of pride for him because he wasn't in danger or anything like that. Just emotionally crushed.

Once he was able to calm down, I held him for a bit, comforting him with his head on my chest (something else that turns me on!). Just rubbing his head, telling him I loved him, that he could do this, and that he was so strong etc. As I talked to him he began to sob more as he shoved his face into my chest trying to hide the fact that I had tortured him to tears. I just let him know he was safe and it was ok to let it out. I love him so incredibly much and he needs to know he is loved, cared for and respected.

I'm not sure if it was him feeling that love and feeling cared for but he suddenly pushed made back on to the couch and dove into my pussy. He was rubbing his face in it, licking, sucking, moaning, whimpering, gasping for air and good Lord turning me on even more. I just had to have more orgasms. I just had to feel it again… but this time, I don't know, I was extremely turned on by his emotional state that I had one of the most powerful orgasms I've ever had. I bucked my hips toward the ceiling, my entire body was shaking, my thighs squeezed tightly around his head and I exploded a big gush of gooey cum from my pussy.

It was a fucking incredible orgasm! I literally couldn't walk straight after. I was stumbling and couldn't focus, it was a drunk feeling. I could barely speak even. Just an intense, intense orgasm. 😀

I thoroughly love having my husband in chastity & being in control of his orgasms because our sex life is no longer focused on him getting off. It's no longer focused on the vaginal sex. Our sex life has evolved into a much greater physical and emotional thing. An all over mind and body experience!

Something I wish I could explain well enough or even compare to something so others could get even a small idea of what this feels like.

Conversations in Chastity: Strength Comes From Within

cagedmonkey: So…….. can I cum yet? 🙂

Lady: Uhhh, no love, it’s just not time for that. Especially when you’re at work.

cm: Of course. Why do I even ask? lol

Lady: Hoping one time I’ll actually say yes? 😉

cm: I guess so, although I have a hard time believing you will say yes. There have been times recently where you were so horny I thought you might cave in, but you didn’t. If you didn’t give in during those times, I doubt you’ll ever give in to me early.

Lady You’re right, I’ve become much stronger than in the beginning. At first I was still in the “need to please him” phase even if I didn’t think I was. Deep down I didn’t want to frustrate you, upset you, etc. It just caused me to be weak to your pleas.

cm: Now it seems like it’s the exact opposite – the more I beg and plead, the more you enjoy it and the harder you push me!

Lady It must be bittersweet that I’ve become so strong, huh?

cm: Honestly, I couldn’t be happier. I know that I can be honest with you about how I feel (sooooo frustrated!!!) and what I want (to cum sooooo bad!!!!), and not worry about influencing you or topping from the bottom. You truly are in full control, and I’m very lucky to serve a dominant with such a strong sense of what she wants.

Lady You are a lucky boy! Hehe 🙂 It wasn’t hard after awhile to embrace the frustration and let it entertain me. Once I was able to almost laugh at your situation, I began to really get enjoyment out of your frustration. I started enjoying the control of making you so incredibly horny for me. I just love getting you to that point where you HAVE to touch me just to feel my skin… because you’re THAT horny.

cm: And I definitely am that horny! Speaking of which…… can I cum now?

Lady No :)~

cm: Damn…..

So, My Lady Was Riding My Cock…

Ok, let me back up a bit.

During our vacation and since then as well, My Lady has kept me unlocked almost as often as she has kept me locked. Perhaps it’s even more tilted towards unlocked, but I haven’t been keeping much track. I’m too busy being teased insane by a hellaciously horny woman nearly every moment of the day.

ML has kept me unlocked so she can tease me whenever she wants and use her “favorite toy” whenever the mood strikes her. And she has been very active in both of those activities. Whether it’s sneaking a quick edge or two when the kids aren’t around or giving me a long teasing blowjob, she is certainly getting her fill of my cock. She has also been getting a good dose of sex, either taking charge and climbing on top of me or having me do all the work.

I’ll tell you this – it has not been easy to remain a “good boy” and refrain from cumming while fucking ML. In fact, I doubt you can classify what I end up doing as “fucking.” I’m often on the very edge of orgasm after just a few strokes into her tight wet pussy. At this point, I have no choice but to hold still as I struggle for control. After I drag myself back from the brink, I can usually manage only a few more thrusts before I’m right back to the edge again. And if ML wants some good hard thrusts, I pretty much have no choice but to give her a few good deep strokes before I have to jump up off of her before my cock explodes inside her.

My Lady assures me that this is not a problem for her, that she expects is after teasing and denying me for so long and that she is the one who is creating the situation. If it truly was a problem for her, she would just let me cum. She makes a good point, but I still want to be able to satisfy her penetration needs. This is why I was so happy that the RodeOh harness worked so well.

Earlier today I found an accidental solution to the problem, albeit not a permanent one. The kids went outside into the backyard to play, which left ML and me with some alone time. My cock got hard pretty quick as ML jumped on top of me and straddled me on the couch. It wasn’t long before I was hard as a rock and sliding into her warm pussy.

So, My Lady was riding my cock, and I could feel the edge approaching quickly. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that the TV was on. Right then, a light bulb went off in my head. A DISTRACTION! THAT’S WHAT I NEED!

So while ML is bouncing her pussy on my cock, her beautiful tits hanging right above my face, I start listening to Stephen A. Smith argue with Skip Bayless about the NFL draft. I’m listening and really thinking about what he’s saying. My Lady’s sexiness is still there, right in front of my face (and right on top of my cock), so it takes a real effort to pay attention.

And then I realize it’s working.

The urge to cum is fading slowly, and ML is still riding me hard. I was able to hold back, even when ML’s orgasm started to hit her. Usually, feeling her pussy squeeze my cock when she cums will be too much for me to handle, but this time I had no problems as she rode me through her orgasm. It was great to finally NOT have to tell her to be careful or to slow down. It was great to feel her cum on my cock without having to resort to her rubbing her clit while I stayed motionless inside her.

As successful as this was, I cannot resort to watching ESPN every time ML an I have sex. We’ve discussed the idea of desensitizing spray, and the RodeOh is also an option. I just don’t understand how guys out there can deal with this problem. I read on blogs here and there about how guys who have been denied even longer than I have can have sex with their KH, and they don’t mention anything about this type of issue. Is this just something guys don’t normally feel comfortable talking about, or is it just me that has this problem?