Mail Chastity – Your Questions

Time again for another round of “Mail Chastity” where we tackle the topics that are on your mind. As always, these are real questions from real readers. Feel free to email us with any questions you may have; your question just may be featured in our next Mail Chastity post!

Click on the contact page in the top left corner for email info, or simply just to see a great pic of My Lady’s beautiful breasts perfectly framing the key to my chastity cage.  😉

Q: Are there any medical concerns involved with being locked up so frequently?

Hmmmm….. good question. There are some medical issues that should be addressed when considering long term and/or frequent wearing of a chastity device. Most of these issues are not very severe if tended to.

The most common occurrence would be skin irritation where the cage sits, either around the scrotum or on the shaft of the penis. This can be avoided by using a properly fitting cage and proper lubrication to allow movement of the cage while walking. Skin irritation, if left unchecked, can lead to blisters and skin ulcers which risk being infected. You don’t want that.

Another common condition that is often seen with open-style devices (Birdcage/Jailbird/etc.) is edema, or localized swelling due to fluid buildup. This happens when the penile tissue expands into the open spaces of the cage. This isn’t the “hardon bulge” I’m talking about… that is completely normal, especially when your keyholder is deliberately turning you into a sex-crazed lunatic. Edema occurs when your erection goes away, but the swelling and fluid remain. This can be fixed by rubbing and massaging the area to promote circulation… just be careful not to enjoy it TOO much and piss off your keyholder! Edema, when not dealt with in time, can cause tissue damage and possible erectile dysfunction if it becomes serious enough.

The issues I have described in the linked posts were not related directly to wearing the chastity device. There were… ahem… other factors involved.

Q: How does chastity effect the day-to-day basis of your life?

To be honest, not all that much. The main difference is that I get crazy horny as time goes on. Duh. Other than that, the cage doesn’t get in the way much. I can play with my children without incident – I try to avoid having them sit on my lap, but they are old enough now where that’s not a big worry. Work is not a problem, even though my job requires frequent walks around the room, as well as sitting and standing. Other than the fact that I’m goddamn-motherfucking-all-batshit-flames-of-hell horny all the time, my life proceeds pretty much in a normal fashion.

Q: How do you decide what to post? Is it a joint effort?

My Lady does most of the posting on the blog, for two reasons. First, she is a major control freak… which she will freely admit, hence the FLR lifestyle. Second, she usually has the most time to post, given that she is a stay-at-home mom with a Galaxy Note 2 surgically attached to her hand. However, we both collaborate on what themes and ideas to post about. Very often, we will be discussing a particular aspect of our lifestyle, and either of us will say, “We should totally write a blog post about this.” She usually just beats me to the punch. We do really enjoy doing the “He Said, She Said” and “Conversations” posts… they are lots of fun, and they give our readers great insight on the types of conversations we have and that we consider necessary in order make this lifestyle run smoothly.

I’ve Got Big Balls!

Sorry, ACDC, but you have nothing to complain about here. Call me when you’ve been locked in a chastity cage and denied orgasm for over two weeks.

My balls are really starting to swell up HUGE. My Lady has kept me in the Jailbird for over two weeks now with minimal time out and absolutely no orgasms. I have spent plenty of time pleasing her and she has spent plenty of time teasing me. And now my balls are significantly larger than I’ve noticed in the past. I actually have to make sure I’m not peeing on them when it’s time to urinate!

I’m not sure of the specific cause of this. Part of it is almost certainly being denied orgasms or draining of any cum whatsoever, as ML has not milked me at all during this latest stretch. I’m pretty much leaking precum constantly at this point, but that is nowhere near achieving the draining I need so badly. I am sure that when (if?) ML lets me cum on Christmas, it is going to be an extremely heavy load. 🙂

I’m also wondering if my balls are looking bigger because my scrotum is being pulled by the cage. When ML teases me, my attempted erection pushes the cage up pretty far on “the equipment” down there, giving the skin around my balls a pretty good stretch. I feel a lot less discomfort with the JB than I did in the Birdcage, but the pull is still pretty strong. During these times, my balls feel large and extremely full, and they turn a deep shade of red. All is well as far as circulation goes – ML has taken a liking to massaging them in this state to make sure blood flow is acceptable (at least that’s her excuse).

My gigantic balls are probably a result of both factors – storing up a large load of cum waiting to be released, and the tight squeezing from the cage every time the cock tries to assert itself. One thing is for sure – they are very sensitive in this state, and I often find it impossible to hold back my moans when ML rubs them. She takes quite delight in that!

Keeping a Low Profile

When My Lady and I decided to give male chastity a try, I was very excited. I wanted to jump in right away. Neither of us really knew what to expect and which details were going to be important. Only when ML and I chose to get a device did I realize how big of a change this was going to be.

“I’m going to have to buy a whole new wardrobe,” I thought.

When we were looking through device styles, I couldn’t figure out how I was supposed to wear one of those things without everybody I walk by noticing a humongous bulge in my pants. The pictures of the devices made it look like they stuck out quite prominently. And, not to brag or anything, but my size would require us getting a pretty big cage. I knew for sure it would be visible in my current comfortable fitting pants.

Then we got the Birdcage. I tried it on, put on my clothes, and….

“Where the fuck did it go?” There was a slight bulge in the crotch of my pants, but it was only visible to me because I was looking for it.

I was amazed. I hadn’t thought of the fact that these cages were designed to be worn discreetly, and were made specifically to not obnoxiously stick out for public viewing. Even when I tried to get hard in the cage, there was no appreciable bulge. I was in better shape than going sans-cage!

I was also relieved. I wanted chastity, but I didn’t want to have to go buy a ton of clothes for it. And I didn’t want to half ass my chastity, wearing it around the house but not in public. So it was a great relief to find out that neither of those measures were necessary.

And now my custom Jailbird hides even better! Here is a pic of me in undies (SHIELD YOUR EYES!!!!):

You can make out the bars if you look closely, but that’s only one layer of clothing. Plus, who is going to be looking at my crotch trying to find a bulge? As ML put it once, they may think to themselves, “damn, that guy is packing a huge cock” and go along with their day.   🙂

Since this revelation, I’ve learned to go with the flow concerning the male chastity lifestyle. ML and I are fully committed to making this work, and we will find a way to tackle any problems that may arise.

How Time Flies

I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or a bad thing, but I’m starting to get used to wearing the cage for extended periods of time.

This week in particular has flown by pretty quickly. Both My Lady and I have been slightly preoccupied with RL things, but I still can’t deny that wearing the cage is starting to feel normal. I’ve been in the BC since Tuesday, and I swear it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still as horny as hell. What I mean is that I’m not sitting around thinking about how long the cage has been on because it feels like it’s been a long time. It’s just another part of my life now.

Obviously, getting more comfortable wearing the cage for extended periods is a good thing…. in theory. In practice? It could end up being bad for me, at least for my sanity. If ML decides that, due to my newfound comfort in extended lockup periods, that she wants to push me even further than before and take a step up in scale from weeks to months… will I be able to handle that?

Will I even have a choice???

Every Day is a “Maybe Day”

My Lady and I don’t use a specific “release date” like some people do, because we feel it takes some control away from her. What if, for example, my release date comes and ML wants to keep me in chastity juuuuuuust a little bit longer? Is she obligated to give me an orgasm? Or, what if it’s not release day yet, and she just REALLY needs to have her cock?

Such was the situation last night. 🙂

My Lady and I had semi-date night at home – it was one of the rare nights I was actually at home and we had nothing to do. So we laid down with each other on the couch, had a few drinks, and got a bit touchy-feely with each other. I pleased her with my oral skills for quite a while, but she still needed more. Describing her pussy, in her own words, “she [was] frisky!”

After ten full days of constant lock up, My Lady needed to feel her cock inside her. So she unlocked me and allowed me to enter her. I’m pretty sure she enjoyed it very much.  🙂   I held off as long as I could until she gave me permission to cum inside her… and I wasted no time in doing that!!! It was so wonderful and intense. I nearly collapsed on top of her afterwards. We both seemed spent, although shortly after we were right back at it again!

I’m locked back up this morning, in the Birdcage this time – we will be sending the JB back for a size adjustment. Although every day is a possible release day in this house apparently, my next official “Maybe Day” is Christmas. I’ll certainly be dreaming of a white Christmas for the next 25 days!

Device Review: Jailbird

I admit, I do not have extensive experience with chastity devices. The only device I’ve ever worn besides the one I am currently wearing was an “off the shelf” Birdcage. I did want to give my impressions on my newest device, a custom made Jailbird from Mature Metal. Most of my comparisons will be against the Birdcage, but some of my comments will just be what they are, not a comparison to anything.

For starters, the device is very cool looking. After My Lady and I initially settled on the Birdcage, we really started to enjoy the look of a steel cage. The Jailbird is very stylish and also very sturdy. The cage is well put together, with no spurs or pinch points that I have found so far. There have been a few occasions where pubic hair has gotten caught in various places, but I think that’s more of a result of me needing a trim than the device itself. The device is slightly wider than the Birdcage. It feels like it should be heavier as well, but it is actually lighter due to the material it is made out of (surgical steel vs. chrome plated steel).

I was surprised by how freaking comfortable this thing is! The Birdcage was very comfortable, but this Jailbird is seriously amazing. It might have to do with the fact that we ordered the oval base ring. I happen to be blessed (cursed?) with rather large testicles, and the oval ring gives them more room to breathe without allowing them to slip backwards. I think the better fitting oval ring also prevents the cage from pushing upwards when the cock attempts an erection. This was a MAJOR issue with the Birdcage, to the point where it would cause near- debilitating pain. Sure, the Jailbird is not exactly comfortable when it squeezes my balls upward as the cock tries in vain to get hard, but it’s not nearly as bad as the Birdcage.

Speaking of trying to get hard… the bars of the Jailbird are just a tiny bit thicker than the bars of the Birdcage. It’s almost hard to tell – ML insisted that I was wrong, but trust me, I’m the one wearing it and I can tell.  🙂  This comes into play when the cock gets hard and tries to press through the cage. The bars of the Birdcage sometimes felt as though they could dig into my skin. They didn’t, but I swear sometimes I got so hard in the cage it felt like it was possible! This is not a problem with the Jailbird. The bars are wide enough to distribute the and reduce the pressure. The bars are also wider apart which reduces the amount of protrusion that happens when the cock presses against the cage (when the cock would bulge out between the bars and rub on my clothing, it would cause an oversensitive pain-ish sensation… not good). The wider arrangement of the bars also allows ML better access to torture her desperate prisoner.

Overall, the comfort of the custom measurements is just one feature that makes the Jailbird a great chastity device. My cage needs to be tweaked just a bit; ML and I have decided that her cock has too much room in the cage and we must shorten the length of the shaft by about an inch. This adjustment will cost a little bit, but it is important to invest in quality when using a device for extended periods of time. For anyone participating in prolonged 24/7 chastity and are looking at this style of device (steel, open shaft), I would highly recommend the Jailbird. Even with a price tag upwards of $300, it is definitely worth the cost.

Deciding on a Device

It’s one thing to be interested in Male Chastity and its quite another to buy a device and start wearing it.

Back in June cagedmonkey introduced the idea of male chastity (that’s for another post!). I looked it up for a few months and got info before I had really made any decisions. Then in September I started to actually research (I’m one of those ladies that goes full on into research when I’m interested in something) different chastity devices. The three main types are Silicone, Plastic and, of course Steel. By the beginning of October I had decided there was no way I could see hubby in anything other than silicone because plastic was just hard and, ewwwww, steel? Who the hell wears steel on their cock?

Haha lmao, yes, I laugh now! Mainly because I went through things the hard way but it was necessary to realize 1. What we needed for hubby’s specific size and 2. What I really did like!


The first device we ordered was a CB6000s style in silicone and we very soon found out that this size was in no way a size that would fit hubby. He couldn’t even get into it and when we did manage to squeeze him kinda in (it was not pretty) once he even began to get an erection he completely pulled the entire device apart lol. This led me to do more research!

I really wish I had found thumpers blog before all this and his post with device reviews! I think it might have helped a bit in getting some real world experience with the different devices.

After pushing apart the silicone device I realized I needed to do some extra research on device fit and how to measure. I managed to get some rough measurements on hubby and found that there were only two types of off-the-shelf devices that came in a size that would fit him. One was a plastic device called The Curve and the other was a steel device called a Bird Cage. This is where my dilemma came to be. I was not ready for a steel device because I still thought penises looked so damn ugly locked up in steel. In reading about the plastic and hearing about injury due to them breaking, I couldn’t help but lean towards a steel device. Especially after watching hubby’s strength and what happened to the silicone one. I just had trouble justifying the cost if he ended up breaking it!


So I broke down and ordered the Bird Cage and figured if I hated it we would deal with it. It only took a couple of days for it to be delivered and we were so excited to finally get the monkey boy locked up and start this journey properly. Once the Bird Cage was out of the box we started with the largest base ring and got the cage on and the lock clicked.

Something happened in me that I never expected! I immediately saw how incredibly sexy MY boy looked in his steel device. It was a beautiful sight and I got extremely aroused at seeing him locked up for me in his device. He put on a steel cage and clicked that lock for me. It was a very emotional moment and the butterflies in my stomach were outrageous. Once I saw his penis through the cage I knew we made an awesome decision. The other thing I find outstanding is when little man in the cage does try to get an erection he presses and squishes against the bars so hard. I love seeing it and knowing that he’s so turned on by me and that he’s dying to get out. After seeing how strong he is to push through the steel bars, there is no doubt in my mind that steel was the way to go for us.

It was October 12th the first time cagedmonkey was locked up and it was not long after that he was wearing it for much longer periods. At this point he was still holding the keys and I did not officially become the Keyholder.

Currently, cagedmonkey is still locked in the steel Bird Cage.